93 Meaningful Conversation Starters & Questions for Couples to Better Connect

Looking for a list of conversation starters to help you connect with your partner? Okay, we think you’ll like this list! Here at The Adventure Challenge, everything we do and every product we have is created with deliberation to help couples, friends, and families have amazing time together, feel truly connected, and create lifelong memories. 

Why Conversation Starters and Questions Are Fun and Important

Conversations are at the heart of all relationships. They are where we learn, where we grow to understand, and where we connect mind to mind and heart to heart. And when it comes to conversation, nothing beats a good question.

The Importance of Questions

Questions draw out stories and moments that otherwise would never go unearthed. They create pauses and opportunities for thoughtfulness and reflection. But most of all, when you ask a good question, you are demonstrating that you care. When you show interest in another person’s experience and opinions, you are showing them that you value them. And showing that you care is at the core of healthy relationships!

Conversation starters and questions are a fun way to take the pressure off of you to come up with good questions. Sometimes we want to connect, but we reach the end of our imaginations. That’s where conversation starter lists like these come in so handy.

How to Use This List of Conversation Starters and Questions

There are plenty of different ways to use this list. One way is to pull it out with your partner and take turns choosing a question to ask. You could work your way through and pick a couple from each section, or you could choose a category to spend some time in.

93 Best Conversation Starters for Couples to Better Connect: Couple sharing a toast over an outdoor picnic.

For a more random and unexpected date, you could roll a pair of dice or just guess a number, and then answer the corresponding question. You have options for how you choose to approach this - but we’d suggest that you don’t attempt to answer every question, or even most questions, all in one go.

They’re called ‘conversation starters’ for a reason. Once you ask a question, lean back and really listen. Let the conversation flow. There’s no pressure to go back to the list any time soon. When the conversation reaches a natural ebb, you can pull up the list again and find another question. The point of this list is to provoke some killer conversation, not just to give you a list to work through.


These questions are arranged in different categories for ease navigating them:

  • Thought provoking questions about relationships: These questions are around your relationship in particular and your partner’s opinions and thoughts on love in general. These meaningful questions open a conversation around your dynamic!
  • Deep questions to get to know your partner: These conversation starters are all about getting a fresh glimpse of the person in front of you. From childhood anecdotes to current dreams, these questions plunge beyond the every day and help you reignite your curiosity for your love.
    • Silly yet meaningful questions: There’s no need to be so serious all the time! These questions can be goofy or whimsical, and they are a great way to bring some laughter and fun into your conversations. Underneath these, though, there is always a chance for a deeper connection.
    • Questions about sex: no explanation needed! Some of these questions invite you to some real reflection on your sexual connection – a topic that can feel hard to bring up on your own. Other questions are hot, and they could be what kickstarts your evening down another direction!

    The Adventure Challenge: Woman lying on the kitchen counter with her boyfriend leaning on top of her.

    Thought-Provoking Questions about Marriage and Relationships 

    1. What is your love language? (Take the love languages test here!)
    2. What’s your favorite thing about me?
    3. What do you think is the difference between romance and affection?
    4. Do you believe in love at first sight?
    5. What do you think is the biggest cause of disconnection in relationships?
    6. What would make you fall out of love with me?
    7. What’s the last romantic movie that got you to cry or at least teary-eyed?
    8. What’s one activity that we usually do together that you would rather do on your own?
    9. If you could get a “relationship hall pass”, who would it be for?
    10. Which one of my habits and mannerisms do you find most annoying?
    11. When am I the most cute to you?
    12. Why do you think we’ve lasted this long in our relationship?
    13. What would our retirement life look like?
    14. Which one of my romantic gestures has been your favorite?
    15. What couple do you admire the most in the world?
    16. Was there any point in our relationship when you felt insecure?
    17. What’s the best way to calm you down when you get worked up about something?
    18. What’s a ‘little thing’ in our relationship that you really love?
    19. How has the way you think about love changed over the years?
    20. Are we turning into our parents?
    21. When do you feel the most connected to me?
    22. What’s your biggest hope for where we go together?
    23. How do you feel about doing long distance?

    93 Best Conversation Starters for Couples to Better Connect: Couple smiling at each other as they drink wine at the kitchen.

    Deep Questions that Aim to Get to Know Your Partner as an Individual

    1. Would you rather be wealthy or intelligent?
    2. If money wasn’t an issue, which passion would you pursue right now?
    3. Which country would you like to live in for the long haul?
    4. What’s one thing you’d like to change about yourself?
    5. When was the last time you felt proud of yourself?
    6. What does it mean to be happy?
    7. What’s your most embarrassing moment?
    8. What are your 5 core values?
    9. What’s the most impactful memory you have with someone who is no longer in your life right now?
    10. Which childhood game or toy did you cherish the most?
    11. What’s the one passion that you’ve kept postponing or procrastinating on?
    12. When do you feel most free?
    13. What do you need in a relationship? 
    14. What’s the most important lesson you’ve learned in the last year? The last five years?
    15. When you are overwhelmed, what do you need?
    16. Do you have any dreams you haven’t admitted?
    17. What do you consider your biggest failure?
    18. What do you think people find the most surprising about you once they get to know you?
    19. What are you most thankful for in your life so far?
    20. What was your first car?
    21. What was your best experience with live music? What made it good?
    22. What’s one experience you’ve had that I haven’t, that you’d want me to get to have?
    23. How do you hope to be like your parents?
    24. And how do you hope to be different from them?
    25. Which book do you think had the most impact on your life?

    The Adventure Challenge: Couple lounging outside by the fire as they talk to each other.

    Silly Yet Meaningful Questions 

    1. How do you think will human life and society change in the span of 100 years?
    2. If you have to sacrifice 1 life to save 10 lives, would you do it?
    3. If our life was a reality TV series, what do you think would be the most appropriate title?
    4. What was your first email address?
    5. Which movie genre would you use to describe your life? (Horror, Sci-fi, Thriller, Comedy, Drama, etc.)
    6. Would you rather never be able to leave this country again, or be able to go anywhere in the world - except here?
    7. What’s your strongest opinion about something that doesn’t really matter?
    8. If we had to cut all of the world’s cuisines except for one, and everyone had to eat it - what cuisine would you pick, and why?
    9. If you could only listen to two albums for the rest of your life, which ones would you choose, and why?
    10. What is your most disgusting memory?
    11. When you were little, who was the coolest person in the world to you?
    12. What’s one thing you’ve always wanted to own?
    13. If your heart was a color right now, what color would it be?
    14. Where do you feel most comfortable?
    15. Waffles or pancakes?
    16. What does adventure mean to you?
    17. What physical object do you want to pass down to your kids?
    18. If I was an animal, what would I be and why?
    19. If there was one daily task you could get rid of doing forever, what would it be?
    20. If you celebrate Christmas, describe your ideal Christmas Day
    21. In fact, just describe your ideal holiday!
    22. What is one food that you want to make into a fun family tradition?
    23. What’s a nickname of yours that you love?
    24. And one that you hate?
    25. If you could give your life a total re-brand, what direction would you take that?
    26. I am most likely to get famous for….
    27. When you go to IKEA, what’s your favorite part of the day?

    93 Best Conversation Starters for Couples to Better Connect: Couple on a date outdoors laughing while holding a golf club.

    Questions About Sex

    1. How important is sex in our relationship?
    2. Is there a sexual position that you’ve been curious to try but haven’t had the courage to ask me?
    3. Has the way you think about sex changed during the course of our relationship? How?
    4. What part of sex is your favorite?
    5. How would you define intimacy?
    6. Is there anything that makes it difficult for you to be fully present during sex with me?
    7. What’s better than sex?
    8. What’s a normal activity that I do that turns you on?
    9. How do you want our sex life to change?
    10. Would you ever want to try out some sex challenges?
    11. Name four favorite things about my body
    12. What’s the best time of day for sex?
    13. Tell me about your best sexual memory - and be as detailed as you want.
    14. What turns you off?
    15. Have your fantasies changed since you met me?
    16. What was your first sexual experience like?
    17. What’s your favorite way for me to tell you I’m in the mood?
    18. Do you have a go-to move in terms of flirtation techniques?

    The Adventure Challenge: Couple sitting on a chair together and sharing laughs during their dinner date.

    Asking the Right Questions

    By now, we hope your quality time tank is full and you’ve learned something new about your partner! But connection doesn’t just have to be verbal – we’e designed a whole book of date ideas to help you take date night to the next level. Check out The Adventure Challenge: Couples Edition to learn more.


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    Couple sharing a toast together during their picnic date; image overlaid with text that reads 93 Best Conversation Starters for Couples to Better Connect
    Couple cooking something together in the kitchen; image overlaid with text that reads 93 Best Conversation Starters for Couples to Better Connect