When a relationship begins to show signs of strain, the cracks that once were manageable become pressure points. You realize it’s happening, the spark is fading, the passion dissipating, and now you’re left wondering what you can do to save what seems doomed. Well, first of all, let’s not get so doom and gloom that we don’t even try to reignite your love.
In this blog post, we will explain how to bring back the spark in a relationship!
Signs Your Relationship Is Losing Its Spark
Identifying that your relationship is losing its spark can be difficult to realize until it’s too late. However, if you’re asking the question, then maybe you’re ahead of the game, and if so, here are ten signs to look out for to determine if your relationship is losing its spark
- Your sex life is virtually non-existent
- Saying ‘I love you’ is no longer common, if it happens at all.
- You’ve stopped going on dates and doing things together.
- You’ve both let yourselves go.
- Physical touch is a foreign concept to you both.
- You go to bed at different times or don’t sleep in the same bed.
- You no longer celebrate milestones.
- You’re choosing to skirt around problems rather than facing them head-on.
- You criticize one another for the little things, even if they’re not important.
- You don’t kiss each other hello or goodbye.
Identifying the existence of a problem is the first step in solving the problem. It’s totally normal for relationships to struggle, especially in long-term relationships.
Why Relationships Can Fizzle
There are many potential reasons why your relationship might be losing its spark. Maybe you've put too much pressure on your connection, or you’re both dissatisfied with how things are between you both. Unfortunately, it often takes a while for the realization to hit that something might have gone wrong.
Here are ten reasons why relationships fizzle:
- The relationship was rushed from the start.
- Your conversations are only surface-level and mimic small talk rather than in-depth discussions.
- You’re not on the same page, and you’re not looking for the same things out of the relationship.
- One partner or both partners are emotionally unavailable or uncommitted.
- Kindness isn’t at the forefront of the relationship.
- The basis of the relationship is centered around passion and nothing more.
- You’re making all the effort, coming up with all the plans, and starting the conversations.
- You don’t fight. You gloss over the negative things and don’t address significant issues.
- There’s no trust between you and your partner.
- Spending one-on-one time together is rare and far between.
In long-term relationships, it’s usually that one partner realizes that for a few months or a few years, they’ve been the only one participating or trying to engage while the other has been disengaged. The real problem exists when both partners are detached and distant. But if you realize in time, how do you get the spark back in your relationship?
7 Ways to Rekindle Your Relationship's Spark
There is hope to be had, so don’t give in just yet! Instead, let’s see if we can turn things around and turn a relationship in danger into a healthy relationship and get the spark back!
#1 - Show Your Partner Gratitude & Appreciation
Taking moments to show some form of appreciation for your partner can jumpstart a dying spark. In a relationship’s early days, there’s a great deal of touching and words of affirmation, but as time goes on, these things become rare. This ends up leaving your partner feeling unappreciated, which can build distance or resentment.
It doesn’t have to be big things. Appreciate even the tiniest instances of your partner doing something for you. Walking the dog, taking out the trash, making dinner, literally anything. Letting them know that you noticed and that you appreciate it can make a world of difference.
#2 - Make Time To Talk
If when you do talk, it's small talk or basic discussions., then it’s time to take a moment to really have honest conversations about anything and everything. Find ways to reconnect by asking each other questions and getting to know one another again.
Even if this means repeating stories you’ve already heard a million times over, do it! Enjoy hearing one another's voice, seeing the smile of a good memory, the sorrow of a sad one. The point is to feel something and feel it together. Nostalgia is a great way to open the floodgates of a good conversation.
#3 - Show Affection as Much as Possible
Physical touch has been missing from your relationship for a while, and it’s time to remind one another what it feels like to touch and to be touched. Affection comes in so many different forms, so you need to figure out ways to naturally incorporate it into your relationship again.
This can be holding hands, kisses on the cheek, cuddling, and so on. If you are nervous about being rejected, make an effort to build to bigger gestures as if you’ve just started dating all over again. It’s scary, but it’s necessary. Physical touch is a love language, and when people lack physical touch, they can disassociate from a relationship.
#4 - Have Date Nights & Alone Time
When you started dating, a date night was probably super common. Now? You likely don’t even remember when the last time you went out on a date was. It’s time to bring date nights back. It can be something simple like going out to dinner or even movie nights at home. It can even be elaborate, something that serves as a reminder of important moments.
The point of it is to be alone together, spending quality time with one another doing something where you’re forced to engage and have some fun. This is especially important if you’ve got children. Getting away from the kids for real alone time is absolutely necessary to bring back some intimacy!
#5 - Spice Up Your Sex Life
When you slowly start losing that spark you once had, both of your sex drives go with it. To reignite your sex life and rejuvenate that sexual energy you and your partner had at the beginning of your relationship, you’ve got to spice things up a little. This means doing things you’ve perhaps never done before, like role play, being more adventurous, or using toys or oils.
If you’re looking for a fun way to revive some sexual intimacy, might we recommend our famous …In Bed Adventure Challenge? This is a sure-fire way to get things moving in the right direction! Intimate time together is important because you want to feel attracted to your partner and to feel sexy again.
#6 - Make Room for Forgiveness & Healing
If you find your relationship is at a point where things are very bitter and arguments are happening more frequently than you’d like, then it’s important to focus on reconciliation. To move on and grow, you’ve got to learn to let go, forgive, and heal. How you go about this is entirely up to you and your partner. If you feel couples therapy is the way to go, then go for it!
To get that spark back means to acknowledge the spark is dying in the first place. Both parties need to want to fix a broken relationship, and communication skills are necessary to start mending the ruins and moving forward. Relationship experts like therapists and counselors aren’t going to fix your broken relationship. Still, they can provide the tools for you to do it together.
#7 - Try Something New
Spending time together is essential, but don’t just spend time together doing the same old things you always do. Instead, go out and explore, do activities that you’ve always said you wanted to do but never did. Our Couples Edition Adventure Challenge is perfect for this type of step!
If you’re not sure what to do, this is precisely the kind of tool you need to add some genuine spontaneity to your relationship again to help get that spark back in your relationship! It’s totally natural to feel afraid of stepping outside your comfort zone. Still, it’s essential and can help bring back a sense of magic felt in the early stages of your relationship.
Getting the spark back in a relationship is never an easy task. It’s good to be prepared for tough times ahead with hard questions being posed both out loud and in your mind. But if you truly want to get the spark back between you and your partner that you had in the earliest days of your relationship, you need to try. Getting back to a healthy, romantic relationship will take time and a recommitment to one another. A long-term relationship is worth fighting for, even if it takes a few months, and worst-case scenario, a few years. Eventually, you’ll be faced with the difficult decision of fighting or walking away. Still, if you haven’t tried, you shouldn’t be even considering an answer to this question.
The Adventure Challenge is no stranger to couples needing a little push to improve their love life. We’ve cultivated many Adventure Challenges for couples to use to spice things up a little. Even couples in long-term relationships should try our new First Dates Set! Check out our store and see what we’ve got to offer so you can get your spark back!
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